Five Years of Screwing Up
Most of you today know Westcoaster only as it is, and what it was shortly before we launched version 6. What you probably don’t know is how Westcoaster came to be, or how this talented, beautiful, big-wienered… and egotistical group of individuals managed to gather in one place for so long.
It started with idle chatter on a messageboard that’s long since gone dormant. Goose’s Realm of Insanity sat on a quiet corner of the internets somewhere. It was mainly a forum for the discussion of Six Flags Magic Mountain, and sporadically brought up conversation about other Southern California theme parks. Read More
Westcoaster Subscription Service
Westcoaster.net is pleased to announce a new way to experience your favorite site. Beginning June 1st, 2005, Westcoaster will be offering a very special membership-based subscription for the low, low, lower than low price of just $29.99 a month. That’s just about a dollar a day! Why spend that dollar a day on some kid halfway across the world who you’ll never see? Do they really need polio vaccinations that bad? SUBSCRIBE NOW!
The Destruction of Grizzly
A bright glare bounces off of Drop Zone and shines on the freshly greased anti-rollback on Grizzly’s first hill. The trains are completing their circuit (barely), with the occasional need of a push on the first turnaround. The wind blows lightly through the southern yellow pine of Grizzly’s support structure. Well… we know it’s pine. We’re not sure if it’s yellow pine or if it just turned yellow because so many enthusiasts have defecated it with urine in mid-ride jaunts on the Barney Oldfield Raceway. Demon cycles through its butter smooth corkscrews, contrasting to the vertebrae-shattering-needlessly-banked-designed-by-a-crackhead-course of The Grizzly. The scene is set for what will be the first of many attempts to destroy that bastard of a roller coaster.
How Christmas Saved America
How Santa Stole the War - A Retrospective on the End of the American Revolution
In the waning years of the American fight for independence from its totally over-protective mother (England), the fighting was fierce. The battles were bloody, and the drug trade from Colombia was really starting to take a financial hit.
Many scholars believe the end of the war can be attributed to the steely resolve of the colonials, with some really lame help from the French Navy. You can never count on those guys to make it to a party on time.
The Confluence of Christianity and Santa Claus
Christmas in Retrospect - One in a Series of Whatever
Over the past year, I’ve realized that I’ve shirked my intellectual responsibilities in being an internet writer. You’re probably saying to yourself, “No, Andrew! We love you! You’re the funniest guy on the face of the planet! We want your hot bod!”
No. You’re wrong. I have been neglecting the very youth that have made our site what it is: a smoldering cesspool of a site that has little-to-no educational value. Or punctuation for that matter.
So I’ve decided to chase after my life-long dream of becoming an educational figure on this pile of mind-sucking donkey mung we call the “World Wide Web.”