Disneyland Resort Update: Pirates, Pixar, Parking, and Porgs*

Disneyland Resort, Anaheim, CA

* No Porgs in this update; I just needed an alliterative capper.  For Porgs, see this update.

Oh man... Albert's gonna regret going to New York and leaving me to this mess. So today we're going to take a tour of the Didnerlann Resort where I guess some stuff is happening, I dunno... do I look like a scientist? I don't know anything. Let's get to it because this update is probably going to take over the next 4 hours of your life. 

Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge

I'm still wondering about the mechanics of edging an entire galaxy, but here we are... the land is speeding towards its 2019 opening and so that means they're doing stuff and putting things where things go and turning on little bits and making them twinkle or not twinkle depending on what they're supposed to do. 

Pixar's Pinocchio Pal-A-Round and Friends and Friends and Associates Parking Structure Featuring Marvel Motorpool and Other Acquired Licenses

Prepare your body for some parking porn... 

Downtown Disney Improvements

Downtown Disney is being improved by closing down dumb stuff... like... wait... ESPN Zone? Movies... Earl of Sammiches... NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Where am I supposed to drink beer and watch a sports and then eat a sammich before seeing a movie NOW?! Disney is ruining my life... 

Wait... what's that? Oh, that's right, I don't even go to the movies here. And I haven't been to ESPN Zone in at least 10 years... and I hate standing in line for a sandwich... 


Pixar Pier Progress

Ah yes, the project that is a solution in search of a problem. Pixar Pier... or "Oh crap, we're building Marvel stuff so we better find a way to keep Pixar in the park..." I'm personally very torn on all of this. It feels unnecessary. Let's face facts, if they really wanted to win me over, they'd restore Paradise Pier to the... well, paradise that it was on opening day as Walt Disney himself wanted it. No peace until Mali-burritos comes back. 

Miscellaneous Resort News

Here, look at these random things... DO IT... LOOK AT IT. 

Pirates of the Caribbean Reopens

So Disney changed a few things in Pirates... because reasons. Here's how it do... 

Albert left placeholder text here that just said "Conclusion."  I conclude that Disneyland is indeed a theme park full of stuff. I conclude that In 'n' Out is better than Five Guys, Shake Shack and/or Smashburger. I conclude that more people need to contribute to "Noodz for Guy Selga." But mostly I conclude that Albert needs to not leave me to write updates because nothing good ever comes from it. 

That is all... be good humans. GOO BAH!

Twerking Ice Cream Cone. Velociraptor. 5 Time Squirrel Herding Champion. Super Hero.